auschwitz birkenau : went to one of the buildings . . . noone there . . . on the door was a sign - press button and the light will remain on for 15 minutes . . . pressed button & light turned on . . . entered . . . a minute later the light was off . . . inside this place of death i was alone . . . deepest dark . . . i couldn’t make a sound . . . i concentrated only on a clear voice inside me saying “find the exit” . . . walked very slowly, carefully, fearfully . . . someone was pulling at my legs . . . another was calling from behind urging me to turn around . . . i choked . . . couldn’t breathe . . . finally i emerged into the bright strong sun . . . i was back in the world of the living and i sat down to breathe . . . i had been truly scared . . . it had been a long time since i had felt such fear . . . trapped in the dark of the place of the dead my mind had been very clear . . . there was no hesitation - no confusion . . . one simple thought . . . get out . . . (A. may 5, 2003: journal one of the summer travels)
Heart Play
My thoughts are wounds in my head. My brain is a scar. I want to be a machine. Arms to drag legs to walk no pain no thinking. (Heiner Müller , 'Hamletmachine' ) Heartplay A May I lay my heart at your feet. B If you don't make a mess on my floor.. A My heart is clean.. B We'll see, won't we.. A I can't get it out.. B Would you like me to help you.. A If you wouldn't mind.. B It'll be a pleasure. I can't get it out either.. A cries. B I will remove it surgically. What have I got this penknife for anyway. We'll have this sorted out in no time. work will keep you from despair. Right, there we are. But this is a brick. Your heart is a red brick.. A Yes, but it beats only for you.. (1981) A beats B to death with the brick.. (Addition, July 1991). ------------- Heiner Müller ----------------- from Heiner Müller Theatremachine translated and edited by Marc von Henning
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