Saturday, February 23, 2002

She dreamed

...

A beautiful village in full celebration, colourful flags whipping in the wind, lots of food & drink, song & dance, laughter & story telling. Friends calling out to me to sing and dance for it is my turn. I sing and dance finishing to much applause and laughter.

I go to the gate where my teacher wishes to enter & share in the celebration.

He is stopped by a group of guards.

He calls out, "Let me in I want to dance, sing and enjoy the revelries with all of you."

"You can't enter," they pronounce, "you are dead!"

I am shocked. I can't believe it. I am absolutely stunned. I want them to let him in. They refuse. I want to contact him and the guards let me out. I can get out but they won't let him in.

There, in front of the gate, sits my teacher singing. The moment he starts singing the whole village turns black & white as if his exquisite lament, expressing his sorrow, evaporates the colours around us and a grey fog descends down on the whole village.

All the faces of the people become expressionless & emotionless. Only I am animated and I turn to my teacher who continues to sing and I listen to the words.

Life is like the wind / Yesterday joy/ Today gone/ The wind that stops in the night/ Life is like the wind/ Coming & going / Nothing remains forever.

He gets up and turns to walk away down the path to another gate. Even though the path is full of people, all in black & white, he makes no effort to talk to anyone. His family and all the people he knew walk by him as he gently blows by them like a sorrowful wind.

He enters another gate to perform the ritual of leave taking. I can't accept his going so I try to give him the song of life but I can't sing. All that comes out of my mouth is a loud scream.

The emperor of the dead watches over him smiling and my teacher turns with tears in his eyes and with all his anger shouts out, "I didn't have a chance to say goodbye! You didn't give me five minutes to say goodbye. This is so unfair. Please, I am not dead. I need time to finish what I have started and people to see and this is all too sudden. Give me another chance."

The emperor replies,"You can't go back. Life & Death are not like that. You have to prepare before not after. You are now in this world."

"Please just one more minute."

"No!"

I heard all this and I tried to say goodbye but all that came out was a scream.

My teacher cried out with regret and anger; "Life is meaningless. What have I done. I don't want to die like this but what can I do! So many mistakes." He continued on towards the final gate where a gathering of black & white people waited for him embracing him singing and dancing.

I tried to join them but knew I couldn't for that was the place of the dead. I watched from outside the gate.

... That was her dream.

:: note :: ... Published with Permission ... It seems you don't even have to blog to be bit by the blog virus ... writings about death this past week, especially Waeguk, invaded the dream of one around me ... capturing a dream feels almost like putting that first snake you caught in a jar ... no matter how much you want to keep it, it must be released to live ... be careful where you release snakes ... more careful where you release dreams ...

Robert H. Goddard. "It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow." [Motivational Quotes of the Day ]